Looking for a Lawyer Who will Make You Happy?

Let me tell you up front: THE LAW WILL NOT MAKE YOU HAPPY and NOBODY PRACTICING LAW WILL MAKE YOU HAPPY.

I know what would make you happy. What would make you happy is to beat the snot out of the folk who are annoying you. The folk who are making you look for me. It's too bad, but the law won't even let you beat the snot out of somebody who swings first; really.

The law only provides one remedy for most injuries: MONEY. It's insane to try to equate most injuries with money. Certainly, if you asked a hundred different people, you would get a hundred different values for the loss of an arm, as an example. For another, how do you put a value on having to walk with a stiff knee the rest of your life? The short answer, of course, is that you cannot. That's why, I believe, we read about such apparent idiocies as we see in jury verdicts. Someone will get more money for a coffee spill than another person will get for the loss of a hand. It seems wrong. Is it? Can you add a fact [or facts] to make them reasonable? I don't know. Maybe if we had heard the evidence we would agree with the juries. Maybe not. I didn't hear the evidence. I wasn't on the jury. I don't know.

Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt? Because deep down, they're really good people.

The good news for businessmen is that only business injuries are normally fairly equitable to money. But even getting back the money the bad guys cost you doesn't pay you for the hassle and normally, you have to pay your own attorney fees. Sure, sometimes the law gives you more money, like punitive damages or attorney fees; sometimes you can get other remedies like injunctions to keep the bad guys from hurting you over and over; and there are other remedies available in special cases [as a group these are called EXTRAORDINARY REMEDIES -- I'm expert in them]. BUT, by and large, for the most part, ALL YOU'RE GOING TO GET IS MONEY and we all know that money can't buy happiness, don't we?